ask ♥emma

Dear Emma,

My roommate is constantly staying up late to do homework.   I have to get up for work everyday at 6:30 in the morning and I can’t sleep with the light on but she’ll keep me up until 3 a.m. every night with the light on to do her work. I’ve asked her nicely to study in the study lounge but she says it is too noisy for her.  I tried getting a curtain to block the light but I can still hear her typing and listening to music. I want to ask her to stop without creating a problem.  How can I avoid conflict?




Dear Tired,

That’s nice of you that you do not want to cause a conflict, considering she is being extremely inconsiderate.   Roommate conflicts are extremely sensitive and must be handled wisely.  Say that you respect that she has to do work but you need your sleep. There should be a mutual respect between you both.  If the problem continues, you should talk to your RA.  Your RA will either talk to her personally, or have a sit down with you both and mediate a discussion to rectify the situation.


Dear Emma,

Since I’ve been in college, I feel like my best friend and I from home have grown apart.  We used to text each other every day, but now our conversations are boring and we often both forget to answer.  We don’t talk on the phone or tell each other what is going on in our lives anymore.  We’ve been friends since kindergarten and I don’t want to lose her.  How can I fix this?


Missing my BFF


Dear Missing my BFF,

A friendship that has lasted that long is important to keep.  Like any relationship, it must be maintained.  You have to make the time to call each other and tell each other what is going on.  Now that you don’t see each other every day, it’s much more difficult to remain close, but it is certainly not impossible.  Tell her your concerns, and tell her you miss her.  She’ll appreciate it.


Dear Emma,

This past weekend, my ex-boyfriend showed up at my door with flowers and a hand-written letter saying he missed me and wanted to get back together.  It was really sweet and such a nice surprise but I don’t think I want to get back together with him. These past few months  of not talking to him have shown me  that I’ve just been happier without him; it’s just too late. I don’t know how to say “I don’t” without upsetting him. What should I do?


Not Wooed


Dear Not Wooed,

Just because he shows up at your door with a letter and some flowers does not mean you are obligated to do anything. He decides to show emotion now and you’re supposed to be there waiting for him? Absolutely not.  You should let him down in the nicest way possible, but be firm.


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