Fifty Shades Disguises Domestic Abuse as Devotion

Fifty Shades of Grey author, E.L. James, did not foresee the controversy. Courtesy of Jeffrey M. Boan, AP Photos

The problem with Fifty Shades of Grey in particular is how viral it has gone. Jeffrey M. Boan/AP

By Marcelle Meyer

There is nothing more ironic than the fact that Fifty Shades of Grey premiered on Valentine’s Day. Is there a better way to say “I love you” than the glorification of non-consensual sex? BDSM is a part of modern sexual culture, and there is nothing wrong with it. It is also important to represent sexual preferences in the media, and it is certainly good that sex is becoming less taboo in society.

However, the portrayal of BDSM in Fifty Shades of Grey sacrifices important parts of sex that should be put front and center — like clear consent and communication — for drama and “exciting” sexual tension.

The problem with Fifty Shades of Grey in particular is how viral it has gone; whether or not you see the movie or read the book, you will undoubtedly know most of the plot points. Most people have heard about the infamous “contract” that spells out the couple’s agreement. Why is this contract so harmful? Because sex in the real world requires consent every single time, regardless of previous agreements.

Things that might look exciting in the upcoming movie are not necessarily acceptable in real sexual interactions. The worst part is that all of the tension, fear and coercion—things that are not part of healthy, consensual sex—are glorified as being exciting and interesting.

It is not difficult to see the influence that media portrayals have on our society. Societal standards for women’s bodies can be traced throughout modern history using advertisements and movies.

These same advertisements and movies can affect how people view their own lives, creating a standard for the ideal life that everyone ought to desire. And, of course, the roles given to women in movies are often overly-sexualized and less than empowering, to say the least.

In a world so heavily influenced by what we see, hear and read in all public media outlets, why do we not show more concern about how something as important as a sexual relationship is portrayed?

Many people have called Fifty Shades of Grey empowering because it represents a set of sexual preferences that are not accepted. However, Hollywood’s portrayal of this set of preferences does far more harm than good. In fact, Fifty Shades of Grey is an incorrect portrayal of BDSM relationships. The books and movie that have been so popular and supposedly invite discussion about the lifestyle is actually an unhealthy representation of it.

There were many better ways to spend your Valentine’s Day (or any other date nights), for that matter, than watching a movie that contributes to the misconceptions about sexual consent in society.

There is one comment

  1. kestrelart

    It was not a great movie but what was explicit was that it was consensual through and through. This is really important. Domestic abuse is very real, I know, but is not remotely like this film.

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